{"product_id":"beautifully-unique-sparkleponies-on-myths-morons-free-speech-football-and-assorted-absurdities","title":"Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies: On Myths, Morons, Free Speech, Football, and Assorted Absurdities","description":"Hi. In your hands, right now, you hold the culmination of thousands of years of human intelligence, ingenuity, and brilliance. Now put your goddamn phone down and pay attention to my book.\n\nWhat is in my book, you ask? (I'm really glad you asked, by the way, because now I get to tell you.)\n\nTime travel. Gay marriage. Sportsballing. Futuristic goggles that DO NOTHING.\n\nTiny brags from my publisher, stuff like: \"This is an uproarious, uncensored take on empathy, personal responsibility, and what it means to be human.\"\n\nExcessive brags about myself: \"An extraordinarily clever, punishingly funny, sharp-tongued blogosphere star, NFL player, husband and father, one-time violin prodigy, voracious lifetime reader, obsessive gamer, and fearless champion of personal freedom.\"\n\nOh, and also an essay on the Pope's Twitter account. Honestly, if that doesn't draw you in, there's no hope left for humanity. I also give my own funeral eulogy, in case you were hoping I'd go away and die now!\n\nSo please, join me in the glorious art of windmill tilting by reading this \"collection of rousing, uncensored personal essays, letters, and stories\" (I have no idea why that's in quotes).\n\nJoin the herd of Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies.\n\n(You know you want to.)\u003cbr\u003eASIN: 0316236772\u003cbr\u003eVSKU: 31URM800ENY5_ns\u003cbr\u003eCondition: Good\u003cbr\u003eAuthor\/Artist:Kluwe, Chris\u003cbr\u003eBinding: Hardcover\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eNote:\u003c\/b\u003e Any images shown are stock photographs and product may differ from what is shown.  \u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eCondition Notes\u003c\/b\u003e: The item shows wear from consistent use, but it remains in good condition and works perfectly. All pages and cover are intact  including the dust cover, if applicable . Spine may show signs of wear. Pages may include limited notes and highlighting. May NOT include discs, access code or other supplemental materials.  \u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Blue Vase Books","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43331682435133,"sku":"31URM800ENY5_ns","price":6.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0589\/4225\/9261\/files\/0316236772-0.jpg?v=1783560043","url":"https:\/\/www.bluevasebooks.com\/products\/beautifully-unique-sparkleponies-on-myths-morons-free-speech-football-and-assorted-absurdities","provider":"Blue Vase Books","version":"1.0","type":"link"}