{"product_id":"my-custom-van-and-52-other-mind-blowing-essays-that-will-blow-your-mind-all-over-your-face","title":"My Custom Van: And 52 Other Mind-Blowing Essays that Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face","description":"Get ready for the read of your life. Never before has a single book combined awesome vans, unicorns, Billy Joel, and erotic fiction in such a potent combination. A writing tour de force? Perhaps. A reading experience that will sear itself into your consciousness like a red-hot branding iron? Without question.\n\nComedian and basic cable superstar Michael Ian Black unleashes the full fury of his astonishing intellect in this collection of short comic essays. My Custom Van is a no-holds-barred assault to the funny bone that will literally beat you into submission with hilarity*.\n\nHow did he do it? How did he create such a fine anthology? Answer: With love. Michael opened his heart and used the magical power of love to write more than fifty thought-provoking essays like, \"Why I Used a Day-Glo Magic Marker to Color My Dick Yellow,\" and \"An Open Letter to the Hair Stylist Who Somehow Convinced Me to Get a Perm When I Was in Sixth Grade.\"\n\nMaybe you think love is not a substitute for \"good writing skills\" and \"spell check.\" Bull pucky! When it comes to writing books, love is the most powerful word processor of all.\n\nSounds pretty great, right? And yet...something is still holding you back from paying the full purchase price of this book. What is it? Perhaps you secretly believe you do not deserve a book this good. Nonsense -- you deserve this book and so much more. In fact, if Michael could have written you all the stars in the sky, that's what he would have done. But he couldn't do that, due to his lack of knowledge in the area of astronomy. So he wrote this book instead.\n\nAnd this flap copy.\n\nEnjoy.\n\n* Michael Ian Black is not responsible for any actual injuries caused by reading this book.\u003cbr\u003eASIN: 1439153531\u003cbr\u003eVSKU: BVV.1439153531.A\u003cbr\u003eCondition: Acceptable\u003cbr\u003eAuthor\/Artist:Black, Michael Ian\u003cbr\u003eBinding: Paperback\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eNote:\u003c\/b\u003e Any images shown are stock photographs and product may differ from what is shown.  \u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eCondition Notes\u003c\/b\u003e: The item is very worn but is perfectly usable. Signs of wear can include aesthetic issues such as scratches, dents, worn and creased covers, folded page corners and minor liquid stains. All pages and the cover are intact, but the dust cover may be missing. Pages may include moderate to heavy amount of notes and highlighting, but the text is not obscured or unreadable. Page edges may have foxing  age related spots and browning . May NOT include discs, access code or other supplemental materials.  \u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Blue Vase Books","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43336849195069,"sku":"BVV.1439153531.A","price":7.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0589\/4225\/9261\/files\/1439153531-0.jpg?v=1783809787","url":"https:\/\/www.bluevasebooks.com\/products\/my-custom-van-and-52-other-mind-blowing-essays-that-will-blow-your-mind-all-over-your-face","provider":"Blue Vase Books","version":"1.0","type":"link"}