Blue Vase Books

Dad Got Crabs (White Elephant Gifts: Bad Christmas Books)

Dad Got Crabs (White Elephant Gifts: Bad Christmas Books)

Regular price $10.44
Regular price Sale price $10.44
Sale Sold out

In stock

Dad Got Crabs: A Cautionary (and Itchy) Tale What do you get when you cross a wholesome children’s book with an STI scare, a suspicious motel visit, and seafood wordplay? You get “Dad Got Crabs” — a hilariously inappropriate adult cartoon book that looks innocent enough to read to your kids... until you actually open it. Presented in a bright, colorful, children’s picture book style, this MA-rated gag gift is definitely not for bedtime — unless your bedtime involves uncomfortable family secrets, shady fish markets, and a dad with a little too much explaining to do. This is not a book for the faint of heart, the easily offended, or anyone who still thinks Dad is a saint. But for everyone else? It’s pure gold. Here’s what you’ll get: A rhyming story full of euphemisms, denial, and scratchy consequences Full-page cartoon illustrations that look like a children’s book but scream “White Elephant party winner” A painfully funny reminder that seafood and secrecy do not mix The perfect cringe-worthy gift for that one friend who loves dark humor and bad decisions This book is the gift that keeps on itching. Whether you’re looking for the ultimate joke gift or a weirdly specific birthday gift for Dad (especially if he’s got a suspicious tan line and a sudden love of “the shore”), this cringe-fest of a picture book hits the spot. Perfect for: Funny book lovers with a twisted sense of humor White Elephant gift exchanges that need a guaranteed laugh Gag gifts for coworkers, in-laws, or your gross college roommate Christmas gifts for that uncle who laughs too hard at inappropriate jokes Bachelor parties or divorce parties (yes, that’s a thing now) Anyone who deserves a humor book so uncomfortable, they'll need ointment after reading Because in the end, we’re not selling a book. We’re selling that moment of shocked laughter — that “I cannot believe someone published this” feeling that lives forever in a person’s memory (and possibly on their coffee table for years of awkward conversations). “Dad Got Crabs” is crude, clever, and crawling with comedy. It’s not for everyone — and that’s exactly why you’re going to love giving it. Warning: Contains adult humor, innuendo, and a dad who just won’t stop making it worse. Buy a copy for yourself. Buy three more as gifts. Then maybe… go get checked.
ASIN: B0F3TTR1Z2
VSKU: BVV.B0F3TTR1Z2.A
Condition: Acceptable
Author/Artist:Gosse, Brad
Binding: Paperback
Note: Any images shown are stock photographs and product may differ from what is shown.
Condition Notes: The item is very worn but is perfectly usable. Signs of wear can include aesthetic issues such as scratches, dents, worn and creased covers, folded page corners and minor liquid stains. All pages and the cover are intact, but the dust cover may be missing. Pages may include moderate to heavy amount of notes and highlighting, but the text is not obscured or unreadable. Page edges may have foxing age related spots and browning . May NOT include discs, access code or other supplemental materials.

SKU:BVV.B0F3TTR1Z2.A

Please Note: Gift cards that are purchased in-store, cannot be used online. These must be used in-store.

Shipping & Local Pick Up

Shipping: Most orders are shipped within 24 hours. Please allow 4-14 days after the item has shipped for delivery. Faster shipping is available for purchase at checkout.

Local Pick Up: Orders will be available for pick up within 24 hours. Pick up at the front desk Thursday-Sunday 10am-6pm .After hours pick ups are available Monday-Wednesday 7am-3pm at the Shipping & Receiving entrance.

View full details